You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
