I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
