OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
i think my cat just said my name.
It's rum buckets o'clock
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
