i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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