Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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