Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
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