I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
