YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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