i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
