If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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