did you get engaged???
Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
