Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Randomize
