He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize