Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
