he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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