Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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