I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
