i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
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