Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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