don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
