dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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