the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
