Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
