party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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