If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
