something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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