how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Randomize
