oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
