Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
That's intense
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Randomize
