We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
Randomize
