Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
