There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
