Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize