Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
This is the high leading the old right now
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Randomize
