i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
