Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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