some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
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