Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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