She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
it was like having sex with a tree stump
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
