Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
You pole danced in your parka.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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