Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize