Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
