theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
