she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
