i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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