I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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