Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
