Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize
