What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
