Do you still have your period?
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
