Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
